-. . . ~ ~ ~. ‘ .-~ ~ . . mean- ~,. ;:: . quite ;a .se’nsitive eat: andlsounds unencumbered. vtith precise ml ::ing;vlere:registered-p~erhai,s;better-by:ime..;than.by most. What was. ~~~, :l.; it then?.Aidefectof:the.understanding perhapsl which only began ~~ to;ilib.rate on:repea~ted :solicitations; or which di~d-vibrate, if you like, ~’. ‘ but,at a lower frequency., or a high.er: :than:that of ratiocination, if [- isucha thing is conceivableiand ,such a thing:;is conceivable, since ~:,. .lcOnceive it. Yes:;the words-lheard;and.heard .distinctly; ~:v::~ ~l;~ ..quite asensitive ear,were heard.a-firstltime;.then: a second, ~. ~ oftenevenathird*.:aspuresounds;freeof.allm. e~aning;andthis ll;~ ~ isprobablyone ofthe reasons.)yhyconversatiori was..unspeakably ~. . painful to me.And the words’l uttered-im yself–and-which must nearly always have gone with.an’-effort.of,theiintelligence,were often to me as the buzzing of an insect..A’nd; thisis- perhaps one~ ~ of the reasons rIw as so:untalkatjye. I ‘rnean.this,tlrouble;l had in understanding not only what.others said;tome:~but:also what I saidtothem.ltistrue-thatinthe~nd-by,dint:Ofpatierice,we:m,kldf ourselyes understoOd. but understood.ii ith .regard. to }vhat. I ask- you. and to what purpose? . And .to the . noises ‘of nature ~too. and the works of men.
With my new phone, experimenting with what sounded like impressive scanning abilities, I snapped a picture of the page I’m on in Beckett’s trilogy (Molloy, p50, Calder version)
I had another go, continuing the same section and managing similar serendepities between two kinds of confusion, though slightly less mangled (perhaps i’m getting the hang of it).
and o] : : . the works of men; I reacted I think in rny own way and withoui~ . desire of enlightenment- And my ‘eye too; the seeing one. musl -l ~ have been ill-connected with the.spider, for I found it hard tc. . name what was .niirrored there..often quite distindtly. And witho\ri. going so far ias to say that I saw the world upside down (that woulc ; . . ‘ have been too easy) it is certain I saw it in a ~way in ordinateb. . ~ formal. though I, was far from being an aesthete, or an artist. And. ‘ ~ ~ of my~ two eye.s only one functioning more or less correctly, I mis.~ ~ judged the distance separating me.from the other world, and ofter,: ~ ~ l’stretched out my hand for what was far;:beyond:my reach, and~ ~ oftenl knocked against obstacles.scarcely,visibte.on the horizon,~ ~ But I was like that even when ‘I. had my~ two ‘eyes, it seems to mel: but perhaps’not, for it islong since’ that eraof niy life. and my recol-. ‘ . . lection of it is more than imperfect. . And nowr come .to think of it, : my attempts at taste and smell were’ s’carcely:morefortunate, I smelt l ~ and tasted without knowing exactly what,nor,whetheritwas good.~ – . nor whetherit was bad. and seldom twice running the same thing. i . . I would have been I, think an excellent husband. incapable of. wearying of my wife and’committing. adultery-only from absent-mindedness